Scott Bryson

Galit Regev

Brianna Sink

True Love Test

Once upon a time there as this ridiculously good looking prince, Bob Anderson. One day while shopping for ingredients for his Israeli hummus dip, he caught a glimpse of a beautiful maiden, Fatima, in the market.

As Bob made his way from the chickpeas to the garlic, Bob bumped into this maiden . They were also standing around an area with fruits the smell of peaches was in the area. They both like peaches, but Bob loved them.Fatima smelled deliciously of olive oil and garlic goodness. Fatima was from the Gaza Strip. Fatima was on a mission for the impending Jihad against the Westerners and other Zionist puppets. Her head was covered with a Jilbab (tradtional headdress of Muslim women) revealing only her seductive jade eyes. Her lashes were so long and beautiful that he could not look away from her.

It was love first sight.  He was a Christian; Fatima was Muslim. The families refused to acknowledge their love for one another. His family was for peace, her family was for war. The families were always fighting with each other. They were not allowed to see each other, so Bob decided to do something about it.  Bob went to meet with the local wizard/psychologist, Jafar, and confided to him that he was in love with  a women he could never have. This was a last resort as Bob thought shrinks had the ability to brain wash people. Jafar told Bob that he must have faith in God. He will decide your destiny. Bob then denounced God and told Jafar to go to hell. Jafar was concerned with Bob lack of faith . Bob knew he had to make his decision on his own.

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They got married secretly in large synagogue which was a neutral place for both. The only witness was Bob's best friend, Ishmael. They were very happy to finally be connected by the vows of marriage.

Only the way out of the synagogue, the small wedding party was confronted by all of Fatima's male relatives. They were armed with clubs, swords, and photon laser blasters. Fatima's father ,Lucifer, told Fatima's older brother Robin to subdue Bob and Ishmael and take them to the Bat Cave (a cave inhabited with bats). Lucifer drug Fatima by her hair to the Bat Cave. Ishmael had faith that God would protect him from the capturers, but wasn't too sure about the fate of Bob.

The torture of Bob and Ishamel was long and grueling. They were subjected to a series of paper cuts ranging from filler paper, copier paper, and cardboard. Ishmael wet his pants and was crying terribly. The decapitated Ishamel as result of his whimpering. Lucifer then told Bob to tell Fatima that he did not love her. If he did not deny his love he would die. But Bob did not comply. The next phase of torture took place.  Lucifer thought that a "swirly" . would surely make Bob tell Fatima that he did not love her,  but it did not.

Lucifer liked to address people with the titles of Mr./Ms./Mrs. and their last name. Lucifer gave Bob one last chance or face death by flatulence. Bob still resisted. The cave began to fill with dangerous amounts of methane gas. Death  beckoned Bob to come into the darkness. Suddenly Lucifer turned on the exhaust fan in the cave and the methane dissipated. Lucifer said "you pass the true love test." 

And from that day on, Fatima and Bob lived happily ever after.

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